Life......

Oh what a morning it has been, yes I went to bed at 8:00 last night, but after my day yesterday I felt no energy and no excitement to do anything. So what better way to vent and get anger out than to sleep it off!! Yet I wake up this morning and have all these missed calls and texts with people angry that I never answered. Who knew sleeping could get people so angry. Sheesh. After my shower I discover that Gizmo has peed on my bath mat yet again. I don't know what his deal is but this did not help me this morning. Then, I decided to clean his litter box....take it out to the garbage and what do I forget to do? Unlock the automatic locking mechanism on the very outside door. So here I am 6:10 standing outside with only my phone (luckily had that) and had to call the landlord to let me in!!! Does this sounds ridiculous enough yet???? For the next hour or so things flowed smoothly....until I got out to my car to start it. I suppose I haven't explained on here that my car has been giving me problems ever since I moved out here. For the most part it starts but runs a little shaky. Lately, it hasn't been wanting to start at all. Just won't turn over and it has taken me probably close to 15 or 20 times to try to start it. After finally getting it started, I made my way to work. I have dropped it off at a pretty reliable mechanic shop that is close to my work. I'm hoping by the end of the day they will at least have the problem figured out and if it is not too much money I can fix it. I had to walk to work, and its not like it was that far, just down the road a bit, but wearing these heels (flats) rubbing the back of my ankle, I will now have blisters to match my horrible day. I will more than likely have a loaner car tonight which is fine by me. It would be nice to drive a new vehicle with no issues for a change. So I don't know what kind of bad thing I did to deserve all this but rest assured I LEARNED MY LESSON!!

Today, I plan to be a little bit more productive when I get home. At least I will if my day gets just a little bit better. Funny thing about today is that while getting ready, everything worked perfect. I didn't straighten all my hair but it looks better than when I do, my makeup looks good, face is clearing up from the stress of last week and I didn't struggle to find a good outfit at all. How in the world does this happen on a day like today? All i can say is that for the past two months life has interesting. Not all bad things have happened but it has been pretty busy and not exactly what I would have expected if you had asked me about this in August. Mind you, this whole year has been just one thing after another.

My biggest sad part of living in B.C. happened in August. I lost a good friend this month and one that I was really looking forward to seeing when i moved out to B.C. Mitchell Fleischaker dated my friend Carley when I lived in B.C. 4 years ago. I knew him growing up but we were never that close. He was a good guy but we just had different friends I suppose. When I first lived out here with my sister, Carley and Mitchell were the people I spent all my time with. We had great times walking around and just talking about life. I miss his sense of humor and having that "big brother" around to rely on. Earlier this year, about February or March, Mitchell came to Stettler to visit before his trip to Cuba. I told him to stop by the Liquor Store and visit and to my surprise he did!!! Gave me a big hug when he walked in and we talked about me moving back to B.C. like we always did. A day later, he asked me to hang out but because I was with Kyle and he didn't want to do anything I declined. To this day, i don't think I will ever forgive myself. He stopped by one more time to say goodbye, gave me a hug, and I told him I would be moving to B.C. in the summer. If things had gone the way I HAD PLANNED, I would have been out here for the beginning of August. And ultimately I would have been here before he died. Things might have been different and he might still be here. Not like it was my fault or that I needed to be out here. But sometimes that is what helps people. Having someone to talk to...The other sad part about living out here now is that Carley lives in Vancouver and does not plan on moving back here anytime soon. I realize that we are still close but when your both working Monday-Friday, taking the ferry and planning out the trip can be long and not something that you would want to do every weekend. So now I feel like that is -2 friends. I wish I had my B.C. pictures from 4 years ago. I wish that they hadn't gotten deleted from my computer because they were all of me Carley and mitchell. Life will go on but everyday I think about this.

So today, as I sit here saddened by my thoughts, I contemplate what could have been. I would write about the plus side but there doesn't seem to be any of that today. So maybe what I'll do is think of something positive or wait for something exciting to happen, and write happy thoughts this afternoon.